This is two of the responses to The "MAN" Rules I got at Ubuntu community cafe, And i got many responses !
The Numbered ones are "Her" Original response, The ">>>>>>>"
Is the next guy's response to her !!!
Remember this is all in fun ! and ment for us to laugh at our selves !
1. Call. >>>>>> About what? Turn on the TV.
2. Don't lie.>>>>> Accusing me already?
3. Never tape any of her body parts together. >>>>>huh?
4. If guys' night out is going to be fun, invite the girls.>>>>>>>> Um, we do - but it's not our wives.
5. If guys' night out is going to involve strippers, remember the zoo rules: No Petting. >>>>>>>We can't help where they touch us....
6. The correct answer to "Do I look fat?" is never, ever "Yes.>>>>>>>>>>>" Please get more confident about yourself.
7. Ditto for "Is she prettier than me?" >>>>>>>>>>>>>Same answer as above.
8. Victoria's Secret is good. Frederick's of Hollywood is bad. >>>>>>>>According to who?
9. Ordering for her is good. Telling her what she wants is bad. >>>>>>>>Then make a decision.
10. Being attentive is good. Stalking is bad. >>>>>>>>>>Then stop parking in front of my house.
11. "Honey", "Darling", and "Sweetheart" are good. "Nag", "Lardass", and "Bitch" are bad. >>>>>>>Holy crap! You're running around with the wrong guys.
12. Talking is good. Shouting is bad. Slapping is a felony. >>>>Not every time....
13. A grunt is seldom an acceptable answer to any question. >>>>>>>>Then get our attention by getting neked.
14. None of your ex-girlfriends were ever nicer, prettier, or better in bed. >>>>>>>>>Who's bringing them up - again....not me.
15. Her cooking is excellent. >>>>>>>>>Thanks mom
16. That isn't an excuse for you to avoid cooking. >>>>>>>>>>Me....cook?
17. Dishsoap is your friend. >>>>>>>>>>Dish what?
18. Hat does not equal shower, aftershave does not equal soap, and warm does not equal clean. >>>>>>>What bizarro world are you living in?
19. Buying her dinner does not equal foreplay. >>>>>>Really?
20. Answering "Who was that on the phone?" with "Nobody" is never going to end that conversation.>>> Shouldn't it?
21. Ditto for "Whose lipstick is this?" Nobody's >>>>>>(sometimes we can't remember or don't know how it got there....really. Really.
22. Two words: clean socks. >>>>>>>Goes without saying.
23. Believe it or not, you're probably not more attractive when you're drunk. >>>>>>>>>Oh yeah?
24. Burping is not sexy. >>>>>>>>>I agree - now stop belching.
25. You're wrong.>>>>>>>>>>No I was mistaken
26. You're sorry.>>>>>>>>OHH yea Am I !
27. She is probably less impressed by your discourse on your cool car than you think she is.>>>>>>>>But She Luv's the back seat!
28. Ditto for your discourse on football. >>>>>>>>>Yea well how come she,s such a tight end !
29. Ditto for your ability to jump up and hit any awning in a single bound.>>>>>>>> Not unlike her ability to hit the roof in a single sentence !
30. "Will you marry me?" is good. "Let's shack up together" is bad. >>>>>>>Milk is good Feeding a cow get pricey
31. Don't assume PMS is the cause for every bad mood.>>>>>just assume !
32. Don't assume PMS doesn't exist.>>>>>>>know it does, Know IT !
33. No means No. Yes means Yes. Silence could mean anything she feels like at that particular moment in time, and it could change without notice. >>>>>>>>don't we know this already.
34. "But, we kiss..." is not justification for using her toothbrush. You don't clean plaque with your tongue. >>>>Oooo - yuck - I threw up a little just thinking about using your toothbrush.
35. Never let her walk anywhere alone after 11pm. >>>>>>>Why do you wanna walk anywhere at 11m?
36. Chivalry and feminism are NOT mutually exclusive.>>>>>>>>Then let me open the door and YOU pay for dinner
37. Pick her up at the airport. Don't whine about it, just do it.>>>>>Pick her up ? I dropped her off !
38. If you want to break up with her, break up with her. Don't act like a complete jerk until she does it for you. >>>>>>>>Sometimes it's easier that way.
39. Don't tell her you love her if you don't.>>>>>>>Unless there is no other way to get the hell out of there !
40. Tell her you love her if you do. Often.>>>>> On this I must agree !!!
41. Always, always suck up to her brother. >>>>>>>>Unless you don't go "that way"
42. Think boxers.>>>>>I like cocker spinals
43. Silk boxers. You're kidding....right? If you only knew what it takes to keep all this in one place !
44. Remember Valentine's Day, and any cheesy "anniversary" she so-names.>>>>> no
45. Don't try to change the way she dresses.>>>>>>>!!/@ 1 1/2 hours later !!
46. Her haircut is never bad. >>>>>hehehehe!
47. Don't let your friends pick on her.I>>>>>>>>f they pick on her they are not her friends to begin with!
48. Call. >>>>>>Is the TV broke again?
49. Don't lie. >>>>>sometimes it helps.
50. The rules are never fair. Accept this without question. The fact that she has to go through labor while you sit in the waiting room on your *** smoking cigars isn't fair either, and it balances everything.>>>But I have to pay for the little S O B even after shes gone !
51. She only let's you think your in charge, no matter how much it might seem the opposite. >>>>Huh? Really?
My take on this as long as we're having fun with this.